Our perfect gift.

In the midst of all the excitement of having a baby, there are still those moments when a parent has to think about the reality of a perhaps more trying situation, such as a special needs baby. At our visit last month, we were asked to think about whether or not we wanted testing for Downs Syndrome amongst other situations that the Lord could bring into our life. After a lot of thought, we also had to weigh the financial side of things. To do these tests would run a bit expensive and most insurance companies wouldn't cover it due to the possibility of, if a parent(s) found out their child had a special need, abortion being be an "option," which is heartbreaking. Of course, for us it wouldn't, but at one point in time, we (especially myself) thought we'd like to know what we had to look forward to, once Baby was here, via testing. I thought that I'd like knowing because it would give us time to understand the unique case our child might have and being so young to start with, it would give Mark and I time to readjust our lives if need be. But after a lot of conversation, prayer and advice, we decided not to go through with testing.

When I told our doctor at this week's visit, a sense of relief washed over me. I, personally, had completely given the situation to the Lord in that moment and made the commitment to trust Him entirely through the remainder of this pregnancy, something I always found Mark seemed to be better at than I am. God is always strengthening me through my husband! It was now all officially in His hands alone and I was to wait patiently on Him. At the end of the day, no matter what situation our child(ren) might encounter, we know that the Lord will bless us and remain faithful to us through all adversity and prosperity. Special needs or not, we will love this little bundle of joy to the fullest as Christ has loved us past all of our own unique situations, even when we leave Him! Every child is a gift and when one receives a gift, he doesn't question it. He welcomes it thankfully. ♥

Mama Bear: Gimme peace!

(pulled from my marriage blog, Becoming His Wife )

**For the record, I'm not as mad as I sound. Just sad at how harsh the world can be. Also, any woman who is trying to stay in shape before, during and after her pregnancy - I salute you! Teach me your ways of health! With that being said, I give you...a rant.**

Invasion of the bump.

It hath begun.

I have noticed that not only were my pants getting tighter and more difficult to button because of the bump but now putting on shoes is becoming a little bit more difficult as the days go on. Really puts it all into perspective. No matter how much I maintain my weight, my stomach grows and it's funny because there is nothing I can do about it.

Every day is a new adventure!

Little kicks! [15 wks. 4 days]

I felt it; I finally experienced "the quickening." I finally know with all my heart that I actually felt this little baby of mine kicking and swimming around inside of me. It is the most extraordinary thing I have ever experienced and I cannot get over the creativity of our Lord!

Ironically enough, I was watching YouTube videos helping young and new mothers such as myself to understand nursing, eating habits, birth, etc., and ended up winding up in various videos in which mothers described or showed their little babies kicking and moving in all sorts of ways. I have always been baffled at this incredible event, but now more than ever it warmed my heart. 

I was in the middle of one particular video when suddenly, ironically enough, I felt the strangest pop/mini punch a little bit above my belly button. I was awkwardly sitting on the couch with my legs crossed and couldn't exactly place the specific location, but I instantly froze. What...was...that?! I thought to myself. No way! It was a sensation similar to flicking the inside of your cheek with your middle finger and what you would feel both inside and out. Very fast. Very unnatural. Very weird.


After calling my husband and mom to share the excitement of what I was sure was my first incredibly-real experience (since I'd thought maybe I felt movement a couple weeks previous but it was very minimal), things settled down and nothing happen for about a half hour. Then, as I was laying on the couch waiting and hoping for something else to happen, I felt the "popcorn bubbles" that I'd heard aaaaaaaall and read aaaaaaaall about. It's true. It's just.like.popcorn. I began tapping the lower right section of my abdomen (around my hip) and each time I would finish, the bubbles would spur up in a cluster-like senesation. I did this a few times and then...the kicks began. Little tiny kicks were flicking my hand pressing gently on the outside of my abdomen and my heart began racing. I could NOT believe it. My baby was actually responding to me!

I can't wait for our little baby's continuous and more noticeable movements a few weeks from now, but at least I can decipher what is and isn't gas. Ha! It's incredibly exciting!

♥